Monday, September 23, 2013

Fresh 48

Months ago, I decided that I wanted professional pictures of Nova done right after she was born.  When I was around 5 months pregnant, I started looking for a photographer.  My friend had some pictures done by Baby Bare Photography and I fell in love.  It was a bit of a splurge for me, but I set aside my blogging money and paid for a fresh 48 and newborn session.  For the fresh 48, she came to the hospital when Nova was just 2 days old and captured some candid photos there.  Then we did the newborn session when she was 8 days old.  Stacey, who is behind Baby Bare Photography is like a baby whisperer.  Her studio is set up perfectly for babies from the temperature to the soothing sounds.  If you are in the Salt Lake valley, I'd definitely recommend here.  I'm only posting the Fresh 48 pictures, I'll post her newborns in a separate post.  And this is the part where I post a ridiculous amount of pictures. :)  ENJOY!

Tuesday, September 17, 2013


Nova will be 4 weeks old tomorrow which is wild to me.  The postpartum stage is such a hard one.  You're on this high of just having a baby and then the pain and reality of real life settles in.  Don't get me wrong, I'm incredibly grateful, it's just a hard transition.  This time around I've had a lot of pain.  It's more than I remember in the past but then again my last c-section was 5 1/2 years ago.  Nighttime seems to be hard after I've been active during the day and I find myself really sore with sharp shooting pains.  It gets better day by day, but I'm ready to feel normal again.  I've also had a lot of migraines.  My weird neurological migraines where I get an aura and everything goes numb.

I had a 3 week post op visit this last week.  I was wanting to talk to him about my pain, my migraines and birth control options.  I was supposed to see my OB but he had a funeral to go to so I had to reschedule with a nurse practitioner.  It was an awful visit.  I waited a half hour in the waiting room and another half hour in the exam room, undressed.  I wasn't in good spirits when she came in.  I told her that I was still having a lot of pain at night and asked if there was anything else I could take for pain besides ibuprofen.  She immediately interrupted me and said she would not be giving me sleeping pills because I had a baby to get up with.  I told her I didn't want sleeping pills, but something for pain.  Then she proceeded to tell me this was all part of "mothering."  She made me feel dumb.  I'm not a first time mom, it's not part of mothering, it's part of a c-section recovery.  Then she asked what I wanted and said if she gave me something for pain that I had to break them in half so I would be able to function.  So first she doesn't listen, then she's funny with me like I'm drug seeking.  I broke down and started crying.  Told her she didn't know me.  Didn't know my history.  I felt like she wasn't listening and was making assumptions.  She seemed taken aback and said she was just "trying to get through her day too."  I was even more mad that she would make it about her when I was the patient.  Call me selfish, but she was pushing all the wrong buttons of a woman who had just had a baby 3 weeks prior.  I told her I wanted her to leave so I could get dressed and go.  That I didn't want anything from her.  She told me she was going to go find another provider.  I got dressed and left. I didn't even talk to her about my migraines to see if they were hormone related or about birth control. I was sobbing and tried to get to the car as fast as I could.  I had Rowan and Nova with me and I think Rowan wondered what was wrong.  I sobbed on the phone to my sweet husband and thankfully he listened and was supportive.  He was actually proud of me for sticking up for myself.  I'm a very non confrontational person and will avoid confrontation at all costs.  I'm not sure what got into me and why I fired back, but I'm glad I did.

My OB called me a few days later.  Apologized and said his mother died.  Got my story on what happened.  He said sometimes as providers they go through their routine and don't realize they aren't listening but that didn't excuse how she made me feel.  I cried on the phone to him and he was patient and listened.  We chatted for about 15 minutes.  He told me I'm probably still having so much pain because of all of the scar tissue that he cut out.  It was more than he normally sees so he said my uterus probably gets inflamed at night after being active all day.  He prescribed me something for the pain and also said that if I had more migraines to call and he'd get me in.  He said it could be a lack of estrogen and they could put me on a low dose estrogen patch.  He seemed genuinely concerned and said that he would see me at my 6 week visit.  I thought it said a lot for him to call me and I'm glad to have an OB that cares.

For now, I still feel like I need to take it a day at a time.  I'm not 100%, more like 80%.  I'm really blessed that Marshall had 2 1/2 weeks off of work, but it's been hard trying to cook and clean and take care of everyone while I'm still not 100%.  I've had good neighbors and friends bring meals in which I also appreciate.  I think sometimes you realize who really cares and who are your real friends when you need them.

Nova is doing so well.  She is getting really chunky and I'm thinking she's over 10 lbs now.  She's starting to grow out of some of her 0-3 month clothes already and has the cute fat rolls around the tops of her legs.  Her cheeks are somehow getting bigger too, it's so cute.  She really is a very good baby.  Doesn't cry much, loves to be held.  She's sleeping 3-4 hour stretches at night which is really nice.  If we keep her up for a while in the evening, she does really well at night.  She is nursing most of the time but we give her a bottle of pumped milk every other day just so that she will take a bottle.  She's also going to be a paci baby like Rowan was and loves her pacifier.  She's starting to focus on things and will follow you with her eyes.  We're waiting for the first smiles to come and I'm sure that will happen in the near future.   She loves the bath and will kick and kick while in the warm water.  I wish I could pause time so she didn't get bigger.

The boys love her so much.  You would think the novelty would wear off, but the first thing they do when they get home from school is check to see what Nova is doing.  They like to talk to her and hold her.  I still don't think they grasp the whole we have a sister, she's a girl thing.  Rowan said when she grows up, she will get a penis like him.  I tell him no, she is a girl.  Then last night, Chandler asked when she wouldn't just have a bum anymore.  All of her anatomy just looks like a big bum, I'd never thought of it that way, pretty funny.  I guess when all you have for years and years is a brother, girl anatomy doesn't make a lot of sense.

So that's our update for now!

Friday, September 6, 2013

Nova's Birth Story

I thought it would be a good idea to sit down and write Nova's birth story before I start to forget details, which I feel like I am starting to already!

We scheduled a c-section for August 21st at noon.  Looking back on it, I wish we would have taken the 7:30 am slot instead.  Throughout my entire pregnancy, I've had to wait a LOT for my Dr.  He's totally worth it and I will go back to him if we have another baby, but wait times for the most part were usually close to or over an hour.  I had one appointment where I only had to wait 10 minutes and that only happened one time.  We got to the hospital at 10 am and checked in to Labor and Delivery.  They put me in a room and started to monitor the baby.  The labor rooms were huge and nice!  My nurse was really nice and of course I can't remember her name.  She was an older lady and asked about 1,000 questions or what it seemed like.  Then it was the waiting game.  At about 11:45, she came in to tell us that my Dr. had 3 women in labor and 4 other patients to see.  I felt a little frustrated, but I definitely knew we were last on the list since I wasn't actively in labor.  The anesthesiologist came in before noon just to touch base.  He made some comment about my Dr. never being on time and we both laughed.  We waited and waited.  I got up to use the restroom about 10 times over the next 3 hours and got pretty good at hooking myself back up to the monitor.  Finally at about 3:30, my Dr. came in.  He apologized and said it was finally our turn!  All was forgiven at this point because I knew we were close to meeting our little girl.  Marshall got all suited up and we walked over to the OR.

Once in the OR, the anesthesiologist had music blaring.  He asked me what some of my favorite artists were or what I wanted to listen to and had a pretty funny and sarcastic sense of humor.  We decided on Cold Play, Colbie Callait, and Sara Barreilles.  He put some ColdPlay on and started putting the spinal in.  The spinal went it easily and then they laid me down and started prepping.  I told the anesthesiologist about my first experience with Chandler and how I was given some med that gave me an outer body experience.  He jokingly referred to it as Special K and knew exactly what I was talking about.  He told me we would try to avoid the Special K.
The interesting thing about a C-section is that it is one of the only surgeries where you are alert the whole time and they allow a support person in the room.  There was a light up above that I could look into and was able to see what they were doing in the reflection.  I tried to avoid looking into it since it was my insides.  Once they cut in, it was a lot of tugging and a lot of pressure.  Marshall said the whole procedure was really clean which he didn't remember before.  Once Nova was born, Dr. Quinn made the comment that she was probably over 8 lbs.  I heard her cry and felt a rush of emotion.  I looked over to see her pink skin and a beautiful baby.  I couldn't help myself and the tears started to fall.  She was perfect.  They weighed and measured her and got her all wrapped up.  8 lbs 9 ounces and 20 inches.  She's the smallest of all of my babies but was also born almost 2 weeks before either of the boys.

One of the nurses handed Nova to Marshall and he held her up to my head.  It was hard to really gauge what she looked like upside down and swollen.  Plus, I was a tad on the dizzy side from everything going on.  Marshall held her close and she had her little tongue out and was rooting for something to suck on.  It's amazing to me that these perfect little babies come out, already knowing what to do.  The next 20 minutes or so, my Dr. worked on clearing out scar tissue from my previous 2 c-sections.  He explained it to me as adhesions that looked like saran wrap on my uterus and other tissues.  He said there was a lot on the left side.  He also noticed a mass about the size of a penny on my right ovary.  It definitely wasn't there at the start of the pregnancy since I didn't see it via ultrasound.  He said it looked very similar to what a benign fibroid on an uterus would look like, only it was on my right ovary.  He told me he was about 95% sure that it would be benign but would send it down to pathology.
At about this point, I started feeling like I needed to cough.  It was a really weird sensation since I was numb up to my chest.  I coughed the best I could and I guess this can happen because of air getting into your vessels when you are open?  They put some oxygen on me and it actually helped quite a bit.

Once they were done, I was wheeled back to recovery which was actually the labor and delivery room I started out in.  I spent an hour here and got to hold and nurse Nova for the first time.  She was a champ when it came to nursing and knew exactly what to do.  I admired her chubby cheeks and perfect little lips.  She does this thing we call kissy face where she puckers her lips up.  She's actually doing it in the first picture we got of her here and she does it quite often.  It's really cute!

After recovery, we went over to the mom baby unit where we would be until Sunday.  I retained a TON of water and my feet got so swollen that I couldn't even bend my toes.  I had great nurses and a lot of wonderful people that came to visit.  It was so fun when the boys  came up to visit and they are in love with their little sister.  They like to hold her, kiss her, and get really excited when she is awake.

There are still so many times that I wish I could have a vaginal birth.  I see how quickly those women bounce back and the fact that they are up and moving around within an hour or two after childbirth.  I got up to use the bathroom the next morning after my c-section and it was incredibly painful.

While we were in the hospital, Marshall woke up the second morning feeling like he had strep throat.  He's had strep quite a few times so he went down to the Instacare and of course tested positive for it.  He was told that he needed to be on antibiotics for 24 hours before he came back to our room.  My mom came up for the night that night and helped me.  She did so much and it was fun to have her there for the night.  Marsh came back and spent the last 2 nights there with me.

While we were in the hospital, Nova got down to just under 8 lbs, but I think she was over 8 lbs when we left the hospital.  At 9 days when we went to the pediatrician, she was 8 lbs 5 ounces, so she's on her way back to her birth weight.  We are going in for our 2 week checkup today and hopefully she's back to her birth weight.

I'm so incredibly in love with this little girl.  She is mellow, beautiful and just perfect.  I'm always amazed at new life and know that newborns are so close to the veil.  Sometimes I wish I could get a glimpse of what she still remembers.

Now at 2 weeks out, I'm starting to feel better and am getting closer to getting off all my pain meds.  I'm just having to take ibuprofen and deal with the massive night sweats.  Thankfully my mom was here for a week and Marshall is still home from work.  He will go back to work on Monday but I'm feeling optimistic about being able to do everything I need to do.